There are all sorts of people in the world. Some like Monty Python…some don't. Some are obsessed with the colour pink, have a great fashion sense, wear ultra fantastic earrings and are generally the coolest people on the planet…and well some just aren't. Some lead the exemplary life of a nerd…while others dare to explore. There are butchers, bakers, candle stick makers, Nazis, Americans, Jews and finally there exists one more category-' The Gult'
The Gult is a creature of temperament. Generally found in a crowd, they are easily distinguished by the somewhat nasal and garbled sounds they excitedly talk to each other with. Now this may not seem a very pleasant description but I assure you, that if you ever succeed in prising them away from their gang, they are some of the most outrageously cool people that exist.
Now I've tried to analyse this interesting fact from many perspectives and have finally come to this conclusion. 'A gult' does not exist. You either take them as a bunch or you ignore the term completely. As soon as you nab one of them and draw them away from the rest, you have with you an individual with feelings and refreshingly droll thoughts and ideas.
Let me back my hypothesis with examples. Three of my closest friends are from A.P. Heres what they're like individually. One of them is in the same department as I am and is one of the craziest persons I know. And when I say crazy I mean super-duper-extremely-over-the-frigging-top crazy! And it's not just her name…which is funny…literally but her entire attitude and perspective of life.
In the first year, she was known for her legendry, undefeated skills in the dreamy and totally underrated art of slumber. It was whispered about in awe that she could sleep through an entire week of classes, labs and NSS sessions (which she rarely attended anyways) without so much as turning a hair. She had an attractive way of dividing her time between things that were important to her. When she was not sleeping she was usually on the net and when she was not on the net…well she was sleeping!
Nothing ever daunts this young lady. One day before an exam she'll open her books, get serious and mug…and what is more do decently in the exam the next day. Much as we have tried to convince her that her habits are all topsy, her invariable response is, "Why what is wrong?" in the blandest, most irritating tone possible. She then proceeds to scold by calling us "dunkeys and idiots" and leaves quite pleased with herself. She dreams of starting a chain of restaurants one day and likes showing off her "entrepreneurship" skills by remarking placidly whenever we go out to eat that the food most restaurants seem to serve is very insipid and when she starts a restaurant, she's certainly going to spice up the flavour by adding a dozen red chillies to anything she would serve!
When reminded quite gently that she'd lose our valuable patronage if she carried on with these wild schemes, she'd smile pityingly at us and say, "I'm sorry. I forgot I was dealing with a bunch of retards."
You may think that this is an insane and an absolutely-one-in-the-million person. But wait until you hear about Shraxy.
Shraxy's full title is Shrax Crax Max Gmax. (Roll it around a bit and you'll sort of get the feel ) If she doesn't want to do something even if it is an absolutely essential thing… she just won't do it! During the end semester economics exam in the first year, she entertained the entire wing by absolutely refusing to study for the exam because, "I'm telling you, I just can't do it!" She kept on thus telling us random stories of how she had displayed similar stubborn fits for other events in her life till around 3 in the morning.
If teased (as she generally is) Shrax has many natural defences. In the beginning, she'll make her Gmax faces at us, saying "He he" as sarcastically as is Gmaxically possible. Finding that the teasing continues, she'll adopt drastic steps. She'll rush up to her tormentor, stand before her with the same sleepy Gmax smile and then all of sudden give the person a sharp slap and then run for her life. This is also known as her 'hit-and-run' technique.
If everything fails, then Shrax still has one more card up her sleeve. She'll simply sit down and say, "If you say anything more, I'll really cry. I mean it!" The best part about this is, she actually did one day and was immediately stopped being teased. I guess it's this secret weapon she has, that acts as a talisman for her!
She also happens to be one of the sweetest persons I know.
The last of my examples is Sindhu. Sindhu and Shrax are generally hand-in-glove. They make all kinds of plans like lets-bunk-lectures-and-go shopping. Usually it is a lets-bunk-lectures-and-sleep. This is one of their favourite policies and the two generally unanimously agree to adopt this.
Thus I have made it abundantly clear that all three of these people are amazing, 'funny' and refreshing individuals.
HOWEVER…..
If all three meet up at one place then things change..DRASTICALLY!!
The room is generally filled with excited squeaks of telegu. The three morph from being three very cool individuals into one identity. They become gultis!!
Don't get me wrong. This is not a bad thing. They're still the same really. But as they become something which we poor non gulti folks aren't familiar with, they seem to be warding us away from another part of their world. And in our inability to understand this other side of them, we scratch our heads and dub them 'gultis'.
