Class got over and as usual my mind was in utter turmoil! I kept on wondering whether it would be worth it! In old Shakespeare's words the question was still, "To be or Not To Be."
Though unlike Hamlet's case, the issue at hand was not really the 'apprehend-my-father's-murderer-IF-it-indeed-was-a-murder', but
whether i should Be at the candy store in the next five minutes or not. :P
The funny thing about memories is that you can never really catch one and bottle it up forever. Perhaps you'll remember an incident, but you'll never feel the same way as when the thing was really happening. You can never truly feel the same thousands of sensory impulses that raced down your spine at THAT time.
Now that is a good thing most of the time. I can tell you at least ten incidents i would never want to recall right off the cuff (yeah, but i won't!..well not right now at least :P)
But the thing is, when I try and relive the last time I ate a delicious hunk of dark chocolate, I sort of feel the same DEEP emotions. But it's never quite the same as actually being there. My memory is a sort of shadow of the actual thing. And that makes it all the more tantalizing!
So as I sat in my seat, wondering whether I should Be or Not To Be, I recalled the last time I had opened that absolutely fabulous Dairy Milk Crackle (it's my all time favorite!). And all at once, the decision was really easy. Just as easy as the fact that Vixen, Vikings and Vegetarians are all party to a secret Vendetta to overthrow the Broccoli King. (I was just kidding! i LOVE broccoli)
Anyways, I had made up my mind. I was going to buy chocolate. :D
As I entered the big general store and started looking around for 'My Chocolate of the Day' (and i'm not talking about the fb quiz)i realized that each candy bar is such a teeny weeny thing! I mean what on earth was I thinking! there was no way anyone could ever get fat by eating such a tiny piece of chocolate. It weighed far less than all of those brinjal things my mom makes me eat. And hadn't my mom heard of mass balance? You couldn't possibly gain more weight than the food you ate! A simple conservation law!
What on earth were all those dieticians, trying to reduce the fat content and all the good things in food, when all they really had to worry about was the WEIGHT of the food stuff itself! Why is that so difficult?
And why on earth do people who want to lose weight eat a big fat pumpkin instead of a tiny bar of chocolate for gods sake!
I was becoming more and more red in the face as the simplicity of things became more apparent as well as the false duplicity all those food guys were hiding behind! x-( I decided to pick up a cadbury fruit and nut and head over to the counter to pay for it.
There was a rather long line of people waiting at the counter to pay for whatever they had picked up. Just in front of me were two guys. One of them was holding a dove soap in his hand and talking about how good Dove was and how it DEFINITELY trumped Lux. I listened to the argument with amusement. I sort of felt really bad for guys in general.
Not only can they not wear things like earrings and stuff(which make life worth living <3)BUT, if you think about it, all the soap advertisements that come on TV, all have these beautiful women running around trees with water droplets glistening on their skin and talking about how whatever soap they were advertising for, worked wonders on them, made their skin soft and radiant and got all the guys after them!
I mean why on earth would a heterosexual guy want guys after him? (I know this smacks of heteronormativity, but lets play along, yeah? Edit: 1/9/2013. I am indeed much older and wiser)
And if you actually think about it, those advertisement guys were then really targeting women. They obviously wanted to send a message to all their women purchasers saying that you could be like this if you just used our soap! They obviously then assume that it is the women who buy the soap in the family and obviously assume that it is the women who get the choice of soap in the family or else why would they target their women purchasers through their advertisements. Does this mean, that they also assume that women have nothing better to do with their time, and hence have more time to buy soap than men?
This is only because, in India, women still do not have as good opportunities as men in most things. Thus as soon as soap adverts change from beautiful women running around trees to handsome men doing the same, can we really say that women are being given the same level of education as men etc etc?
:P
Anyways, I paid my bill and left. Musing and sighing about chocolates, soap and life.It's a funny world!
Thursday, February 25, 2010
Monday, February 22, 2010
i'm-really-bad-at-thinking-of-titles
OK, I finally know what my goddam problem is with everything.
I've just finished reading 'The Catcher in the Rye'. Now, with most books, when you reach the end, well you know you've reached the end. You sort of see fireworks and neon signs saying, 'THE END' loud and clear, with a glowing red sunset in the background.
But when I finished this book, I had this really empty feeling in me. Like I had missed out on the point of the book. That I had not really got a word of what the writer was trying to tell me.
And then today I suddenly got into one of my 'moods', and sort of understood something. I understood the difference between characters in a play and people.
The difference is that we don't have goddam ideals!!
We're so caught up in our stupid, petty lives. We're so intent on getting enmeshed in those short term things, the things that directly affect us like getting a good job, a car, a house, in getting 'settled' that we lose the larger picture entirely! We let go off our ideals! We let go of who we can be, and take the more comfortable road. We kid ourselves by saying, "hey, this is the REAL world." Or, "Let's be practical."
We become trapped in this web of fear. We force on ourselves a list of rules and regulations, telling ourselves that the end justifies the means, until we become too goddam 'man of the world' to really go back to being that kid who used to watch disney movies, dreaming about becoming someone strong and true and basically someone who understood that life isn't a full time pain in the neck, but a soaring gift, snatched from eternity.
And that's exactly what the catcher in the rye told me. He wanted to prevent those little kids from falling off the edge into the world of adults with jobs and important things. He was shielding their dreams. He was preventing them from losing faith in their ideals by coming in contact with the world.
Once you lose yourself in the flow, there is no coming back.
OK. The reason I'm writing this, is not to say, "hey! Look at me! I'm an idealist" or "hey you goddam practical, real people, you suck!" That would be wrong, because firstly, people in glass houses are pretty vulnerable. Secondly, I guess that you can't survive on dreams. Dreams ain't manna from the sky. All i'm saying is, that if you have to make an important decision, please don't do it because hey! everybody else thinks its cool. Make it because you want to make it, alright?
I've just finished reading 'The Catcher in the Rye'. Now, with most books, when you reach the end, well you know you've reached the end. You sort of see fireworks and neon signs saying, 'THE END' loud and clear, with a glowing red sunset in the background.
But when I finished this book, I had this really empty feeling in me. Like I had missed out on the point of the book. That I had not really got a word of what the writer was trying to tell me.
And then today I suddenly got into one of my 'moods', and sort of understood something. I understood the difference between characters in a play and people.
The difference is that we don't have goddam ideals!!
We're so caught up in our stupid, petty lives. We're so intent on getting enmeshed in those short term things, the things that directly affect us like getting a good job, a car, a house, in getting 'settled' that we lose the larger picture entirely! We let go off our ideals! We let go of who we can be, and take the more comfortable road. We kid ourselves by saying, "hey, this is the REAL world." Or, "Let's be practical."
We become trapped in this web of fear. We force on ourselves a list of rules and regulations, telling ourselves that the end justifies the means, until we become too goddam 'man of the world' to really go back to being that kid who used to watch disney movies, dreaming about becoming someone strong and true and basically someone who understood that life isn't a full time pain in the neck, but a soaring gift, snatched from eternity.
And that's exactly what the catcher in the rye told me. He wanted to prevent those little kids from falling off the edge into the world of adults with jobs and important things. He was shielding their dreams. He was preventing them from losing faith in their ideals by coming in contact with the world.
Once you lose yourself in the flow, there is no coming back.
OK. The reason I'm writing this, is not to say, "hey! Look at me! I'm an idealist" or "hey you goddam practical, real people, you suck!" That would be wrong, because firstly, people in glass houses are pretty vulnerable. Secondly, I guess that you can't survive on dreams. Dreams ain't manna from the sky. All i'm saying is, that if you have to make an important decision, please don't do it because hey! everybody else thinks its cool. Make it because you want to make it, alright?
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